Lover Awakened by J.R. Ward. Photo: Goodreads
Dark, dangerous and sexy! A rough past does not mean you're broken beyond repair because love can crack just about any shell!
Can I start off by saying this series went from good to great to the best of the series yet - and for me I think that peak has been reached. J.R. Ward started the storyline for Lover Awakened in Lover Eternal quite honestly and while she does give some background at the beginning of the story if you haven't read the others - I think you'd be doing yourself a great disservice if you didn't read the second book in the series before starting the third. In fact - Lover Eternal included the meet scene for Zsadist and Bella and even their first 'sexual encounter' if you can even really call it that (if you know, you know).
But I need to start off by saying once this storyline was introduced in the second book I couldn't put it down because I just HAD to know more. I finished Lover Eternal and then started on Lover Awakened within a matter of seconds - the damn thing interrupted my sleep schedule as I went to bed late at night and woke up early in the morning because I was so eager to keep reading. All in all - I finished Lover Eternal and Lover Awakened in less than four full days. The story of Zsadist and Bella is one that hooked my attention from the moment they appeared on the page. Zsadist seemed to have the same enthralling effect on me as a reader as he did with Bella. Basically, this book was unputdownable for me and I'd like to tell you all the reasons why.
Please note: the following section will have spoilers. If you don't want to read about spoilers, just know that I rated this book 5* as like I said I was unable to put the book down - I devoured it in such a short span of time. Plus I think what really made this book better than the previous two was the depth of the storyline for the hero at least. Zsadist's past is quite deep and raw and what comes from that is the most interesting change in character throughout the length of the novel. Of course, the flip side to this is that it could be read as the most unbelievable. Both Wrath and Rhage change slightly when they meet and fall in love with their shellans, however, Zsadist's transformation as a character is by far the most significant - and that change is all thanks to Bella. Now it depends on if readers like that trope or not - can a woman really be the force that changes a man down to his core? Even if that man has been stuck in his dark ways for years (in Zsadist's case around 100!)? That's for you as a reader to decide - whether you buy what the book is selling (like I did) and believe that true love can help people change for the better - or that it's just a bunch of bologna and that people never change no matter who enters their lives. That's up to you! But I very much enjoyed being on the character's journey and by the end I had a tear in my eye as Zsadist's life was really changed for the better.
For real spoiler section now (and a slight trigger warning for r*pe) as I attempt to breakdown this book that has a whole bunch of content and backstories (which honestly is a good thing as it added some more depth to the characters - but Ward does seem to always have a few storylines going at the same time which sometimes makes the book feel a bit crowded). Case and point of my last statement - in Rhage and Mary's story - the storyline of Zsadist and Bella was introduced and explored towards the end. I found it only slightly strange that Ward decided in that last 75% of the book to practically start the next book.
Starting with their first meeting, Bella is pretty much entranced by Zsadist as he's fighting alone in the gym. Fast forward to when she sees Zsadist again at the party and immediately goes after him. Personally my heart was racing from that second encounter. She isn't deterred by his original hostility. However, my heart was in my throat when he seemed as if he'd rape her - I'm not into forceful sex scenes (even if the female is into it) - it just teeters on a line I rather not be near. But when you are shown that Z is really shaken by the encounter and is sick from it - you see how close his humility actually is to the surface. I personally think that Z's humanity wasn't as buried as Phury (his twin) seemed to think.
Zsadist's background is unique and heartbreaking - and honestly nausea inducing. The idea that this warrior - who is supposed to be big and strong and unbreakable - was tortured mentally and physically and used for his body is quite upsetting. But it does put a spin on the usual. When I spoke to friends about this book and explained Z's history - they were initially confused that a male was raped. But that doesn't mean it cannot happen - it's just something that isn't discussed much. I think it's a powerful message - that even 'warrior' men can be abused and they can be somewhat broken - but not beyond repair.
But what is also unique is that Bella is soon captured and tortured as well - but in a completely different way. She is never raped, but the lesser beat her and mentally tortured her until she wished for the relief of death. When Z does end up getting Bella back and saving her - the two must learn together to overcome the trauma of their pasts and try to find a way forward...together.
Watching Z learn to love for the first time - as he'd never felt pleasure in the past - was such a unique experience and it kept me hooked wanting to read more and see him slowly return to life. That's not to say that there were not f*cked up situations in this book. A few examples being Zsadist's near sexual assault of a (willing) Bella, Z being whipped and beaten by Phury for Zsadist's own personal need or when they finally do lay together - Z forces Bella to intentionally hurt him to get off. I found those scenes bordered the line of too disturbing and may definitely turn some readers away from finishing the book. But I do think that those scenes did serve a purpose for the overall story - however, they weren't vital so it is just personal taste if those scenes are too much to handle.
Onwards to when Z bonds with Bella, but still won't admit his feelings for her - I wanted to smack him upside the head. It kept the tension between them alive even after they had been together in bed. But the ending was so damn sweet that it made all the pain and tension worth it. Bella making Z a father and Z learning to eat right and take care of his body and mind (by learning to read) - be still my beating heart! I thought it was beautiful when Z started to cry over learning he'd be a father and hoping he'd have a daughter. Proving once more that warriors can show emotions and that it takes a real man to be hard and soft at the same time.
I think the story wrapped up perfectly with a little bow on top! The happy family with a new sweet little girl named Nalla. But not all ended joyously for all the characters. Phury was one step away from becoming a hard-core drug addict and he's still in a really rocky place. Not happy after losing Bella and almost dying for his twin - it left him in a really uncomfortable place. Same is said for Tohr - his story was so joyous to start with. His wife Wellsie was going to have a baby and they just welcomed John Matthew into their home and felt like he was the son they never had. Then when David (the POS lesser who kidnapped Bella) kills Wellsie - Tohr isn't seen for the rest of the book - this death also has a profound impact on John Matthew as well.
All isn't roses and happiness for all the brothers - but Zsadist's story was one that I'll think about for a while after I've finished reading. I was ensnared just as Bella was by Z's dark demeanor and when his past was leaked little by little I couldn't help becoming more obsessed with him and his journey.
Lover Awakened is a heart-wrenching story of abuse but rising from the ashes and finding love and happiness after what feels like years of being in total darkness. It does play into the trope of a woman can ultimately heal a broken man - but oh who gives a damn! I found it addictive and dangerous and seductive with a splash of discomfort. But not to fear - it ends with a perfect happily ever after (at least in Bella, Zsadist and Nalla's case). I would recommend to any fans of vampire romance novels - however, I have a feeling this series has peaked and this will be my favorite story from the Black Dagger Brotherhood series. But there's only one way to find out if that's true - to read the next one! Onto Lover Revealed!
Rating: 5/5 Stars
Buy Lover Awakened here.
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